johncox88's blog

The Saga of ‘Adam’ and ‘Steve’

Nov 27

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Last night I was having trouble getting to sleep. This was compounded by the fact that there were two young men outside my window having an argument.

I can’t remember the guys names so for the purposes of this blog entry they shall be called ‘Adam’ an ‘Steve’.

Now Adam, who doesn’t live in Glasgow, was visiting Steve in his flat for some kind of social gathering or ’soirée’.
Adam, being a jack-the-lad type, jokingly shouted to Steve’s girlfriend,

“Get your tits out!”

Steve’s girlfriend, Aislene, didn’t hear this but Steve was taken aback by his friend’s chauvinistic outburst.

“That’s disgusting the way you speak to women.” He declared, “All the girls in the flat think you talk down to women.” He added.

Adam, believing himself to be as much of a friend to Aislene as he is to Steve, did not agree. He cited an occasion where he said something out of line and Aislene had rightly told him so. He continued that she knew he jokes about and that she would have said if he was out of line with his ‘tits’ comment.

However, she did not hear his comment so therefore there is no logic behind this. She may well have thought it was out of line but could not pass judgment on grounds of ignorance.

Adam became increasingly more agitated with Steve, who remained very quiet throughout. His ranting continued, hopelessly trying to defend himself whilst mistakenly using the word “independent” when “impartial” was clearly the correct word in the given context. He tenaciously insisted to Steve that he “respects him more than he’ll ever know” whilst bemoaning his current living conditions. He admitted that he spends a lot of time at other flats because he can hear his “ex-girlfriend of 10 days have phone sex with her new boyfriend in the next room”.

Suddenly, an angry cry from an unseen window. A disgruntled occupant of a ground floor flat had become frustrated with the rising noise levels.

“Shut the fuck up!” She frustratingly yelled.

“Are you fucking serious?” Adam retorted. “It’s your fucking flat that’s always playing music and keeping me up!” He reasoned.

The young girl slammed her window shut in anger and the two continued their argument in relative peace until its sudden and unknown conclusion. i.e. I went for a piss and when I got back to the window they’d buggered off.

It’s was like and episode of Hollyoaks was taking place right outside my window!

But not really.

Doncha Wish Your Pumpkin Was Hot Like Mine

Oct 28

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And So It Continues…

Oct 05

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COXXINATED

Killing Time With Lulz

Oct 02

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hells yeah

An Interesting Conversation With A Man In The Bus Station

Sep 29

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I sit down in the bus station to write a birthday card and the young man next to me shows me his phone and asks:
“What does that say?”, the text message on the screen just says ‘a negro’.
“um, it says negro”, I answered
“What?”
“Negro”
“What’s that?”
“You know, like, a black person”
“Is that a boy or a girl?”
“Either”
“Oh right”

Then as I’m writing the card…
“You writing a card then?”
“yep”
“Is that to your girlfriend?”
“No, my sister”
“Oh right, whats wrong with her then?”
“What? its her birthday”
“Oh, I thought like, there was something wrong with her”
“No, its just her birthday”